Sober roommates can be essential sources of support for addiction recovery. For individuals who are trying to stay sober, it is generally crucial to live in a sober environment. People who have developed good coping skills likely have no need to avoid loved ones or family members who are having a beer or two — they can handle these potentially triggering situations without fear of relapsing. However, individuals in early recovery are often far more vulnerable to triggers and benefit from living in a sober home. Even people who have been sober far longer often prefer living in a sober environment, and not only because doing so helps them stay sober. The fact is, in sobriety it can be boring or even annoying to live with people who are spending every night getting wasted. At worst, it can be dangerous and triggering.
Piles of crushed beer cans, open wine bottles turning to vinegar, and spills on the rug… This kind of lifestyle may once have had an appeal to you, but chances are in recovery you want something better for yourself. However, having sober roommates not only allows you to live in a more appealing environment, but it also provides you with much needed social support, which research shows is crucial for long term sobriety.
But how does one go about finding sober roommates? There are multiple resources available for finding roommates who don’t drink or do drugs. These resources can be utilized by people in early recovery and by people who have several years sober under their belt.
Sober Living Houses
Sober living homes are by far the best resource for finding sober people to live with. Residents of sober living homes agree to stay drug and alcohol free as a condition for living there. This ensures that everyone else has the privilege of living in a sober environment. Sober livings are generally comfortable homes with modern amenities, and choosing to live in one provides a guarantee of a safe, trigger-free environment.
More importantly, sober living houses offer tangible support for recovery. They are more than just places to sleep and eat for sober residents. In fact, sober living homes tend to offer a wide variety of recovery resources and structure for residents. Many of them facilitate involvement in 12-step programs and support groups. Sober living home staff also work hard to connect residents to any services they need, from medication needs to outpatient therapy. Sober living homes do not offer clinical treatment for substance use disorders, but they help ensure that anyone pursuing sobriety gets the support and assistance required.
Many people make use of sober living homes as a first step in recovery. However, they are also often recommended for individuals who are graduating from inpatient treatment programs. Sober living homes, like halfway houses, offer transitional living arrangements after a person has graduated from an acute addiction treatment program. Instead of finishing a residential treatment program and then jumping back into one’s old life, sober living home clients can take the time they need to develop more coping tools and a strong sober social support system. Sober living houses thereby bridge the gap between acute treatment and the “real world.”
Finding Roommates After Graduating From Sober Livings
In most cases, sober living homes allow people to live there for as long as they need. While some stay for only a few months, most stay for approximately one year. This ensures that residents are able to build a solid foundation of sober tools, develop a support system, find employment, and heal past damages. In many cases, residents stay longer than a year. By the time they graduate, they are not only sober, but they have begun accumulating the many gifts of recovery: namely, a fulfilling and joyful life.
Sober living home staff provide extensive support to residents as they plan their new lives outside of a sober living home. In many cases, graduates go on to move into apartments with fellow sober living house alumni. Finding sober roommates is easy after spending a year developing relationships in a sober living home and in the city’s broader recovery community.
Online Resources for Finding Sober Roommates
There are also plenty of online platforms that can be used to help people discover sober roommates. Not everyone wants to out themselves as sober on their public social media platforms. Making a post saying, “Looking for sober roommates — I’m an addict/alcoholic!” can feel a bit embarrassing to individuals in early recovery. Fortunately, websites and apps that are devoted specifically to helping sober people connect can help avoid such embarrassments.
https://mysoberroommate.com/ — Roommates in Sobriety was founded by two sober women who are both perplexed by the same question: “Where do I live after addiction treatment ends?” The website allows users to write custom roommate profiles, list their property, and search for vacant rooms within their area. Not only is it free to use, but all users are sober!
https://www.sobergrid.com/ — Sober Grid is not specifically meant for helping roommates find each other, but that is how many people use it. Sober Grid is a social network, like Facebook or Twitter, but designed for sober people. For individuals who are looking for a sober community that they can access anytime and anywhere, the Sober Grid app is essential. In cities throughout the world, Sober Grid users are finding each other and offering each other support and friendship. You may also luck out and find your next roommate here.
12-step programs like Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous are designed to help people get sober and stay sober. To that end, they offer strong community support and a program of recovery that is designed to eliminate the obsession to use drugs or alcohol. In fact, many sober living homes make use of 12-step meetings and principles to help residents stay sober. After graduating from a sober living home, 12-step programs are one of the most commonly utilized aftercare services by sober living alumni. 12-step meetings are entirely cost-free, and they are available 24 hours a day in most major cities throughout the world.
More to the point, 12-step programs can be an invaluable resource for meeting sober people and finding sober housemates. It is often simply a matter of making an announcement that you are looking for a roommate during a meeting’s designated announcement period. Chances are, you’ll have multiple people reach out to you with interest. At the very least, someone will at least know someone who is looking. AA and NA meetings are filled with people at many stages of the recovery journey, which means you can easily choose someone who has plenty of sober time — or you can be of aid to someone in early recovery.
Find Recovery and Sober Housemates at Design for Recovery
Design for Recovery is a men’s sober living house located in West Los Angeles. Our spacious and comfortable home contains all modern amenities. Best of all, however, our residents are completely sober. At Design for Recovery, our residents work together and support each other as they progress along their recovery journeys. As a structured sober living home, Design for Recovery also offers young men a high degree of support as they work to repair the wreckage of their past and take positive steps toward new and more fulfilling lives in sobriety. Our sober living home is firmly rooted in strong principles and the philosophy of the 12-steps. We believe that recovery is not just about quitting drugs and alcohol — it’s about comprehensively developing a sober way of life.
If you are ready to find your new sober roommates, contact Design for Recovery today for a free and confidential consultation.